Beauty: A state of mind

After having a really bad day a few days ago I felt it the right time to write about this. All of my life I've struggled with the way I look. There are times when I'm walking by a mirror whether its through a shopping centre, my house or sometimes any kind of reflective surface and I have to look away. On those days I become incredibly withdrawn, I cry over everything and I feel like a burden. The thoughts that go through my head are that I'm ugly, disgusting, stupid... and all those kind of awful negative words.

What helped me was talking. Crazy and simple as it sounds, talking to a partner, best friend or family member can do you the world of good. Why? Because they see you for how you really are, not how you think they see you. They see your inner beauty as well as your outer beauty. By inner beauty I mean your strength, kindness and love.

I honestly believe beauty is a state of mind, because on those bad days, I feel drained. But after I let out all the feelings, and took in (and accepted) how others see me. I felt so much better, it wasn't like it was a magic switch and I suddenly felt beautiful. But I felt like I could look in the mirror and not hate it. I felt like I was loved for who I was, which showed that I can't be as bad as I think if people love and care for me.

But you shouldn't judge yourself based on how others look, because more than likely they are looking at you and thinking exactly the same. What needs to change is how the media portray both women and men. Truth is the people in those magazines don't look like the people in the magazines. It's all been airbrushed, photo shopped and filtered to hide the spots, lumps and bumps that everyone has. Another thing that needs to change is educating children to seeing that we should not only accept our differences but embrace them. Also that beauty isn't just how we look on the outside, but our inner selves too. And hopefully bullying will decrease, which may be a wild dream, but you never know.

xx

Growing up 'mixed-race'

I wrote mixed race in quotation marks in the title for a reason. That reason being because there are many terms used but this one seems to be the one people use the most (myself included). If it does offend I apologise, but is exactly why I put it in those quotation marks.

 I'm half Japanese, my mum is Japanese and my dad is English. I've lived in England my whole life.

For the most part people think it's pretty cool to be half Japanese, and it is! Its meant I've grown up around being able to try different and amazing foods, been able to visit Japan on several occasions to see family and it has opened my eyes to understanding another culture first hand.

But with that I've faced quite a bit of racism too. I've had someone shout at me in the street telling me go to back to my own country and people saying all sorts of words to me, which I won't write down because its completely offensive and doesn't need to be repeated.

There have also been times when someone will say 'are you Chinese?' and when I reply no half Japanese, I'll get the occasional response of 'Well what's the difference?'...Well its a different country for a start...

The best way to react to racism? Is to not react to it. Most of the time its just idiots trying to look hard by intimidating people. The other times its just lack of understanding.

Overall its pretty great and enjoy being able to tell people about the adventures I've been on, foods I've tried and generally random stuff I know. I hope anyone else is able to feel comfortable and proud of who they are and no one should make you feel otherwise.

xx