I've struggled to write any post for a while so sorry for it being such a long time. I've struggled for a few reasons, firstly actually settling on a topic, two being tired from work and three I just didn't know how to put into words how I was feeling.
So this time I decided to write about self-hate. Having been bullied all my life by various people, whether it was peers or previous boyfriends. I occasionally get stuck in these 'holes' of self-hate. No matter that right now my life is actually pretty good, one thing at work, home or even just walking down a street can trigger those tiny words in your head that eventually get too much to bear. It's almost like being stuck in a crowded room where everyone talking at the same time, there are no windows so you feel like you can't breathe. Noisy right? That's what anxiety feels like. It's a constant battle of positives and negatives.
There are days I really dislike myself to the point of hate and other days where I feel I look alright. Logically I know it shouldn't matter what I look like on the outside, but sometimes walking past someone on the street you just think, wow I wish I could look different. But the truth is, everyone feels the same.
So here's how we all should break the cycle together because no one should do this alone. Tell your friends and family they are beautiful in their own crazy way. I wouldn't go far as to shout it to random people in the street, but a smile goes a long way. I feel like I've written a similar post before but at the minute this is just what I can manage.