Thursday 3 December 2015

Anxiety: It's okay to cry


Today's been a bit rubbish so I thought I'd put this one up earlier than I'd planned to. Also to point out this doesn't just apply to people with anxiety. Everyone has their bad days, weeks and even months. Sometimes it's okay to have a good cry. I'll give you an example that's really personal to me. I've been bullied, that's no secret I've said it before in previous posts, but I've never given any specifics. In fact a lot of my friends and family don't know about this. Bearing in mind this happened about 13 years ago and it's stuck shows how bulling can affect a person.

I was in Year 7 and coming home from school on a public bus like usual. Only this time a boy from Year 11 decided to shout abuse at me down the bus. This led to a bus load of school children laughing at me. At first I was mortified, then I just was too upset I sat at the front of the bus trying to hide my face crying. As he got off the bus he pulled my hair to try to get me to look at him, when I didn't move he shouted more abuse at me and got off the bus. I was that upset I completely missed my bus stop. I just want to point out none of my friends on the bus helped me. Luckily a girl who lived on the next street from me helped me off the bus and walked me home.


To this day going on buses triggers anxiety, I dig my nails into my hands and have to eat mints, sweets or look out the window to distract myself on the journey. I've also realised I tend to rub my nails (weird and also a reason nail polish never lasts on my hands).

So here's what I mean, my hands aren't dirty its shadow..

Back to my main point, if I didn't cry, letting all the feelings out I reckon I wouldn't be able to talk about it now. So crying is good, it doesn't mean you are weak. Cry it out, watch a film, indulge in some treats, then talk to a friend or family member about it. And if you cry again it's okay.


I hope me sharing this extremely personal story helps someone out there.

xx

4 comments:

  1. I had similar issues i has chewing gum stuck in my hair people would smack and push me and call me hagrid on the bus i had dictionaries threw at my head in class icecream shoved in my face and hair after school and i felt so alone i took to calling childline to this day i feel its contributed to my anxiety sometimes severe and i end up in resus hyperventilating sometimes just having a poo day for no reason!
    So heres to people like us who hage grown to be someone and be something and learnt to screw the low lifes that ruined our teens!!xxxxx

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    1. aww no :/ Completely agree about the last part, if anything they made me stronger xx

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  2. You are an amazing person love you lots xxxx

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